I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
