they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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