every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
