goodnight i made you a song goodbye
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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