My boss' voice literally gives me gas
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
