To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
