I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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