Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
