OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
