ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Bring me that man meat
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
