she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
