Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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