Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
