She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
