I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
