It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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