i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
