Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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