Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
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