you traded sex for a burrito?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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