community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he told me I talked like a deaf person
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
