I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
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