just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Randomize
