You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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