All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
