i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
