woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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