so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
