Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I've blown a few things in my day
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
He? As in you personified your dick?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
