Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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