but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Randomize
