Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
