Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
