The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
