Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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