I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
