That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
