i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
