I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
