Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
