Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Threesome in a minivan. New low
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
