i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
