Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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