when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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