quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
