you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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