Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
