Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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