No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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