dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
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